Friday, July 24, 2009

holidays ending soon...

My 1 month holiday is finally coming to an end. which means...no more sleeping until 11.30 am...no more online-ing until 2am...no more playing and fooling around...its time to get serious again..problem is, i don't feel like switching from holiday mode to serious mode...lol...but the situation is NOT giving me any choice...sighs..back to square one...i'm sure those exams papers and lecture notes are more than happy to see me...i hope this one month of holiday had changed my mind, my thinking....hopefully, i can let my past just be a past, and move on with a new beginning. sometimes, i just wished the chemistry that happens in you when you see 'someone', does not happen in me...too bad..i am just a human...i cannot change human nature...whenever you see tis 'someone' , you are totally focused on her...your surroundings becomes black and white...as she approches...your heart beats faster and faster...you wished that you would'nt be so akward and looked away just coz she walked past you. all you wanna do is to open your mouth and say hi and smile. things don't always work the way you wanted. a simple action and yet so difficult to take. as she walked past day after day, you would want to say hi to her..but you would just keep your cool and pretend nothing happens. convincing yourself of having chances to do it that you could do it another day or when the 'time' was right...until one day she was with another guy...what you gonna do ?? sit in a corner and lick ur wounds?? never give up without a fight?...there was a chinese quote that says, " i can accept failure , but i can never accept giving up..." if you didnt give any effort, how are you gonna expect things to turn out ? sometimes , i am really amazed with people's courage with this...they express their feelings...and the next day you see....a sweet couple holding hands...once a really close friend of mine said, 'if you really, really like her...tell her...don't let that chance slip by...or you might regret for the rest of your life. you cant sleep well , the food that you eat doesnt have any taste and the bath you take doesn't make you wet or any cleaner''.....sometimes i might think that, ''oh well, she's better off with him..he's a thousand times better than me....'' thats really running away from the truth...'tao bi shian she..' my fren wud say.............


STOP being a fool james, and concentrate on something else lah....

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